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NVC Resources on Relationships

  1. Jim and Jori Manske share the wisdom of Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication (NVC). Join them to learn why knowing what you want before speaking is essential for clear, meaningful interactions. This snippet from their eight session course, 9 Skills for Navigating Conflict, explores how to make "confirmation requests" to ensure you're understood—whether you're navigating a tough conversation or simply ordering pizza!
  2. Self-Empathy "Wrap" Process

    Self-Empathy "Wrap" Process

    Mary Mackenzie

    Audio · 46 minutes · 7/29/2010

    In this inspiring audio, Mary takes to a more profound level the traditional NVC self-empathy process of identifying judgments, feelings and needs, by adding a "wrapping" component.

  3. How to Ask for Responsiveness

    How to Ask for Responsiveness

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 12/28/2020

    If it's a tender topic and/or you are looking for a particular level of responsiveness, you can let listeners know what you want back before you share -- or you can ask them for a particular kind of response right after you share. The more you can do this, the more it can create supportive relationships in your life. Read on for ways to ask for a particular kind of responsiveness to meet particular needs.

  4. Lonely Together

    Lonely Together

    Roxy Manning

    Articles · 5 - 7 minutes · 8/31/2020

    When conflict or criticism occurs, we can notice two layers of meaning to create connection: the content and the needs the speaker is holding. When we are able to recognize this --and ideally engage open-heartedly, with curiosity, make clear requests, imagining what they want, no matter how their expression was framed -- we have more opportunity to support the longevity of our relationships, and to decrease our loneliness when together.

  5. From Blame To Power

    From Blame To Power

    Miki Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 12 -18 minutes · 5/31/2022

    Blame is opaque when we don’t reflect on it deeply. We blame when we don’t see ourselves as having power to shape things, and see others as the ones who can. Blame and how we respond to it, is both a symptom of inability to step into power, and an impediment to empowered relationships. Transforming blame requires self-responsibility. Read on for practices involving empathy, inner connection, power, preparation and engaging options.

  6. 10 Ways To Identify Your Needs

    10 Ways To Identify Your Needs

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 3 - 5 minutes · 06/05/2022

    To learn to identify and speak from your needs requires specific tasks and practices. Here's a list of 10 learning tasks and practices for you to choose from. Some of these ideas include using needs cards and lists, working backwards from strategies and ideal scenarios, reflecting on past experiences and relationships, and asking for/offering/exchanging empathy.

  7. Conflict Evolution Policy

    Conflict Evolution Policy

    Jim Manske

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 3/12/2023

    This document is for organizations that want to integrate NVC. The intention is to use conflict as a stimulus to personal growth, more open and honest relationships, and life-affirming change. It mentions using NVC skills such as self connection, empathy, honesty, and requests (and protective use of force as last resort) to navigate the conflict with an intention of connection.

  8. Boundaries and Exquisite Self-Care

    Boundaries and Exquisite Self-Care

    Yvette Erasmus

    Video · 6 minutes · 05/23/2023

    The purpose of setting boundaries is to prevent harm to yourself and others. In this video, Yvette Erasmus describes how and why exquisite self-care requires exquisite boundaries.

  9. You Ask too Many Questions!!

    You Ask too Many Questions!!

    Rachelle Lamb

    Articles · 9 - 13 minutes · 2/1/2024

    Reveal what's in your heart before asking a question to help build trust, especially if you're in an authority figure. Otherwise, your question may sound like a demand, blame, trap, intrusion or accusation, and it may elicit a defensive response. If you get a "question" like that, give them empathy. Read on for reflection questions to see how our revealing and our withholding impacts our relationships with others and with ourselves.

  10. When you say yes, check if you are saying it out of submission. Similarly, when you say no, are you saying it genuinely or out of rebellion? Marshall Rosenberg calls this a loss or erosion of goodwill which can destroy or undermine relationships. In this video, Rachelle Lamb shares how submission and rebellion in communication can diminish your power.

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