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To express opposition without stimulating distress, stop judging and look for ways to honor, understand, and have compassion for others. You can do this by finding a point of agreement. For example, you can agree with part of what they said. Or if you completely disagree, you can express what greater understanding, inspiration, appreciation or empathy you have in response to what they're saying. Read on for more on this, plus, ten sentence stems to get you started.

The more we can stay present with our hurt, and own our interpretations, we are more likely to express what's important to us without blame and also to become resilient. From there, the listener can have more space to offer their full presence and empathy. Read on for more.

There's reactive anger - the sudden outbursts of words, temper or action that create a nervous system response in another. And then there's the anger that's a reaction to someone's anger -- a nervous system startle-response. Instead of either of these, we can learn to heal with empathy, look for unequal power dynamics, take responsibility to make repairs, and shift into the clean, life-serving, fully expressed anger and love.

Roxy Manning discusses the need to expand our understanding of observations within Nonviolent Communication (NVC). She challenges the idea of objective observation, noting its limitations, and introduces internal observations, citing personal experiences to illustrate their influence on emotions and self-perception. Additionally, she emphasizes systemic awareness as a crucial aspect of observation, highlighting its importance in understanding broader societal issues. Overall, Roxy advocates for a comprehensive approach to observations in NVC, incorporating external, internal, and systemic perspectives to foster inclusivity and empathy.

Here we explore variants of conflict patterns in part two (of this two part series) that include: refuting "straw man arguments"; not checking understanding, repeating unhelpful behaviour; repeatedly asking for what's already given; asserting rather than demonstrating responsiveness; assumptions; denying conflict exists; neglecting interdependence; stonewalling; absence of curiosity, humility, respect, empathy or care (even when reflecting).

This document is for organizations that want to integrate NVC. The intention is to use conflict as a stimulus to personal growth, more open and honest relationships, and life-affirming change. It mentions using NVC skills such as self connection, empathy, honesty, and requests (and protective use of force as last resort) to navigate the conflict with an intention of connection.

Puzzling about needs and feelings? Check out this excerpt from Dian Killian's course, Embracing the Body: Somatic Self Empathy, where she leads participants through an exercise that demonstrates how our physical sensations connect us to our feelings and needs.

Reveal what's in your heart before asking a question to help build trust, especially if you're in an authority figure. Otherwise, your question may sound like a demand, blame, trap, intrusion or accusation, and it may elicit a defensive response. If you get a "question" like that, give them empathy. Read on for reflection questions to see how our revealing and our withholding impacts our relationships with others and with ourselves.

Use this worksheet to check to see if you’re making a request, rather than a demand. Clarify and connect your request to your needs. Check your motivations. Use a phrase, question, or empathy guess to connect to the person if they say “no”. See sample requests for actions, offers, and for deepening understanding.

Listen in as Mary deftly blows the role of facilitator wide open in this excerpt from her very popular 2021 course, Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence. She also covers a variety of useful tips such as what to do if you feel lost or confused, how to trust your gut, and ideas around utilizing empathy for yourself!