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NVC Resources on Connection

  1. Finding Your Way from Judgment to Discernment

    Finding Your Way from Judgment to Discernment

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 4 minutes · 01/01/2024

    Judgment is an attempt to protect from hopelessness or insecurity, at high cost. Instead, check in with fear, grief, or hurt. Then wonder what needs are at stake for everyone. This makes space for grief instead of anger, for negotiation rather than control, and for "calling in" rather than excluding. Wonder: “For whom would this be life-serving or not?”, “What strategies would care for all needs?” or, “What can I contribute now?”

  2. Addressing Inequalities in Groups Using NVC

    Addressing Inequalities in Groups Using NVC

    Roxy Manning

    Trainer Tips · 5 - 7 minutes · 03/01/2024

    In a workshop, a hesitant white neurodivergent man faced a triggering reaction from a Global Majority transgender man. Uncovering their backgrounds, the facilitator addressed family dynamics and exclusion. A repair exercise fostered empathy, challenging assumptions and emphasizing the importance of equitable facilitation for a richer group experience.

  3. Read how an American Buddhist NVC teacher with Jewish roots reflects on how any dehumanization in the Israel-Hamas conflict can be used to justify all kinds of violence that can escalate for generations. With acknowledgment of the complexities, his desire is for us to bring in respect, dignity and peace -- for both Israelis and Palestinians. He emphasizes compassionate advocacy of all humanity amid the ongoing crisis.

  4. Inbal speaks to a group about our habit of demanding something of our children but making it sound like a request, the components of a true request and the importance of being honest when making a demand.

  5. Choice in the Face of Demands

    Choice in the Face of Demands

    Arnina Kashtan

    Audio · 1 hour, 8 minutes · 7/29/2010

    No one likes demands. Do you want to have access to choice when requests or demands come your way? Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she provides tools to free yourself from the submit/rebel dynamic.

  6. Love as a Need

    Love as a Need

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/14/2017

    Trainer Tip: In Nonviolent Communication, we consider love to be a need. Remember that needs are universal; everyone has the same ones. We all need love, but the ways in which we express it can be very different.

  7. Some people in the NVC community consider the words "privilege" and "power" triggering and/or evaluative. From this perspective, how can the concepts of "privilege" and "power" be considered part of the NVC teaching?  This writing piece examines the power and privilege debate.  It also discusses what the author sees as Marshall Rosenberg and Gandhi's stance on the subject...

  8. Empathy in the Face of Powerful Structures

    Empathy in the Face of Powerful Structures

    Dian Killian

    Articles · 12 - 18 minutes · 3/21/2019

    Here's an inspiring story of one citizen (the author) who faced a police officer and judge in court to contest a transit ticket... and inspired structural changes in the way one aspect of New York City transit operates. She inspires change with her application of empathy for self and others, acknowledgement, connecting requests -- and an inspiring vision of understanding, shared reality and living in a city where people have some trust in one another's intentions.

  9. Enjoying the Jackal Show

    Enjoying the Jackal Show

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 12/31/2020

    Trainer tip: Be aware of your inner jackal chatter today and make a commitment to listen for the underlying needs they are trying to tell you about.

  10. Learning From Our Regrets

    Learning From Our Regrets

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/13/2022

    Trainer Tip: When have you responded in a way you didn’t want? How could you have handled that situation differently? What would have better met your needs? Try not to judge your behavior, but learn from it. Each time we review our actions, we can learn something, become more adept at new skills, and come closer to our ideal. We can do this with the learning curve of practicing translating people’s words into feelings and needs.

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